New Year Resolutions

For those who didn't get the memo, Yes, it is 2012.


So with that said...

'Tis the time that we rededicate ourselves and salute the goals we want to achieve this year. I say rededicate because for many of us, we forget our goals. So many of us are so much like that. As President Hinckley said it, 
"We pledge our loyalty; we affirm our determination to be of good courage; we declare, sometimes even publicly, that come what may we will do the right thing, that we will stand for the right cause, that we will be true to ourselves and to others.

Then the pressures begin to build. Sometimes these are social pressures. Sometimes they are personal appetites. Sometimes they are false ambitions. There is a weakening of the will. There is a softening of discipline. There is capitulation. And then there is remorse, self-accusation, and bitter tears of regret."

Today is the beginning of a new year. Ahh, doesn't that sound relieving? Isn't it nice to start over? To turn over a new leaf? If there was ever a time to change, quit a habit, or improve quality of life, now is the time, now is our time. This is our moment, we only have one life so I say let us square our shoulders and stiffen our resolve to make up for lost ground.

For whatever your personal New Year resolutions may be, I hope that they will be remembered everyday this year and dust your life with the greatest of joys.

Some may be struggling with self-improving goals for this year. Some may be struggling with change. I'm not sure what the answer is to all those questions but I would like to, for a moment, share some thoughts if I may.

To be completely honest with you, I have edited this blog now about four or five times. I have grown uneasy with the streams of thoughts I have about this traditional New Year resolution project we annually place upon ourselves. Not because they are heart wrenching thoughts, but because I have more than I should have. I have concluded my direction of thoughts to be on the of subject: Change.

Before I get started into the meat, let me share with you some interesting facts about New Year resolutions.

• While 52% of participants in a resolution study were confident of success with their goals, only 12% actually achieved their goals.

• In 2007, the University of Bristol showed that 78% of those who set New Year resolutions fail, and those who succeed have five traits in common.

• Men achieve 22% more often when they engaged in goal setting (eg: a pound a week, instead of saying "lose weight"), while women succeeded 10% more when they made their goals public and got support from their friends.

I put up those statistics so you could say to yourself, "Yes, I can do better, and will do better!" And yes, the start of a new year is the traditional time to take stock of our lives and see where we are going, measured against the backdrop of where we have been. I do not want to write about the past and the future, not so much in terms of New Year's commitments per se, but more with an eye toward any time of transition and change in our lives. (Holland)

When we make goals for ourselves, we are essentially making changes for ourselves. Change, as we may have experienced before, is not easy. Especially if we are diving into something totally foreign. I would like to share some thoughts about looking back and looking ahead.

Oft times we, like Lot's Wife in the Bible, found ourselves not looking back, but in our heart we want to go back. It would appear that even before the first week of the year is finished we are already missing those bad habits of last year. Setting goals and experiencing change is not a multiple choice test. We cannot expect to change if we don't form a habit of pure desire to change. In a note, let not our attachment of the past outweigh our confidence in the future. Addiction has never been easy to overcome, but it has always been worth it. Eating unhealthy can be bring immediate gratification but soon it catches up to us and a lasting sense of dissatisfaction lingers within ourselves and the way we look.

So, as a new year starts and we try to benefit from a proper view of what has gone before, I plead with you not to dwell on days now gone, nor to yearn vainly for yesterdays, however good those yesterdays may have been. The past is to be learned from but not lived in. We look back to claim the embers from glowing experiences but not the ashes. And when we have learned what we need to learn and have brought with us the best that we have experienced, then we look ahead.

May I conclude my thoughts with the concept of "Labeling." I have been concerned with this idea of resolutions and striving to improve always but failing for whatever the reason. Many of us traditionally jot down the life-changing list almost identical as the one from last year but I know there are a few of you out there that really do want to change and I congratulate you and admire you. 

For the rest of you who surround those who want to change, let them. Let people transform. Let people grow. Believe that people can change and improve. If something is buried in the past, leave it buried. Don't dig up past habits and shove them in their face. Jokingly you may receive a similar curve ball. In the end everyone is drenched in their past mistakes and unhappy feelings. Such dwelling on past lives, including past mistakes, is just not right. 

I know for myself that I could not grow if I consistently had been beaten down with my past mistakes making me feel worthless. My self-esteem would crash, my self-worth would be running on empty, and how I viewed my purpose in this life would get a little more dim.

Change is possible, I know it is. I have done it. I am so grateful beyond words for my wife who encourages and supports my wanting to change and improve my life. She cheers me on when I am doing well, she helps me when I'm in a rut, and celebrates with me when I accomplish my goal. 

"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit." Aristotle